The Check Is in the Mail, I Won’t Cum in Your Mouth, I’ll Respect You in the Morning, and ………

ISPs saying that their, "Excellent Customer Service" is why people do not change their internet providers.

So we have now discovered the 4th big lie of our world.

ISPs have been assiduously conspiring to create local monopolies because this allows them to treat their customers like sh%$.

It's not for nothing that the USA has the most expensive and slowest internet access in the developed world:

Lobby groups for Internet service providers claim that ISPs' customer service is so good already that the government shouldn't consider any new regulations to mandate improvements. They also claim ISPs face so much competition that market forces require providers to treat their customers well or lose them to competitors.

Wait, wut?  You motherf%$#ers are claiming that people stay with you because they like you?

Cable lobby group NCTA-The Internet & Television Association told the Federal Communications Commission in a filing that "providing high-quality products and services and a positive customer experience is a competitive necessity in today's robust communications marketplace. To attract and retain customers, NCTA's cable operator members continuously strive to ensure that the customer support they provide is effective and user-friendly. Given these strong marketplace imperatives, new regulations that would micromanage providers’ customer service operations are unnecessary."

………

While the FCC Notice of Inquiry said that providers should "offer live customer service representative support by phone within a reasonable timeframe," USTelecom's filing touted the customer service abilities of AI chatbots. "AI chat agents will only get better at addressing customers' needs more quickly over time—and if providers fail to provide the customer service and engagement options that their customers expect and fail to resolve their customers' concerns, they may soon find that the consumer is no longer a customer, having switched to another competitive offering," the lobby group said.

The ISP lobbyists must have been laughing so hard that some of them choked on their own spleens.

Why the Biden administration let this slide so long that they will be reversed, or worse, permanently banned from regulating customer service under the Congressional Review Act (CRA), because they don't want to piss off lobbyists.

F%$# the f%$#ing lobbyists.