Damn. I Can't Write this Badly.

Well, it's time for the Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest, 2008 Results.

I'm relieved that there people who write worse than I do, even though they are trying to write badly.

The winner, if you can call it that, was one Garrison Spik of Washington, D.C. :

Theirs was a New York love, a checkered taxi ride burning rubber, and like the city their passion was open 24/7, steam rising from their bodies like slick streets exhaling warm, moist, white breath through manhole covers stamped "Forged by DeLaney Bros., Piscataway, N.J."

I'm impressed....Horrified, but impressed.