15 September 2024

I am Clearly in the Wrong Timeline

When antivaxxer, hypocrite, bat-sh%$ insane fruit loop, and former Presidential candidate Robert F. Kennedy, Jr. announces that he is under federal investigation for beheading a dead beached whale, all of use are clearly in the wrong timeline:

Robert F Kennedy Jr has said that he is being investigated by federal authorities for collecting the head from a decapitated whale carcass.

During a campaign event on Saturday for the Republican nominee, Donald Trump, in Glendale, Arizona, the former independent presidential candidate said: “I received a letter from the National Marine Fisheries Institute saying that they were investigating me for collecting a whale specimen 20 years ago.”

He added: “This is all about the weaponization of our government against political opponents.”

Kennedy, who endorsed the former president after dropping out of November’s election, fell under scrutiny in recent weeks after the resurfacing of a 2012 interview that his daughter Kick gave to Town & Country in which she addressed the whale in question.


Recounting how the creature washed up on a beach near Hyannis Port, Massachusetts, she said: “[He] ran down to the beach with a chainsaw, cut off the whale’s head and then bungee-corded it to the roof of the family minivan for the five-hour haul back to Mount Kisco, New York.

“Every time we accelerated on the highway, whale juice would pour into the windows of the car, and it was the rankest thing on the planet. We all had plastic bags over our heads with mouth holes cut out, and people on the highway were giving us the finger, but that was just normal day to day stuff for us.”

Seriously?

I don't know what's coming next in this year's parade of dysfunction, but if I had to make a prediction, it would be that RFJ, Jr. would be outed as a sadistic equestrian necrophiliac, but that's probably beating a dead horse.

1 comments :

Anonymous said...

Perhaps he’s the one eating the housepets in Ohio.

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