Where Can I Find the World's Smallest Violin?

Because Gym Jordan just lost his vote to be the speaker of the house for the 2nd time. He actually got 2 less votes this time.

I need to play the aforementioned violin just for him: 

Representative Jim Jordan, the hard-line Republican from Ohio, lost a second bid for speaker on Wednesday after running headlong into opposition from a group of mainstream G.O.P. holdouts who vowed to block the ultraconservative from the leadership post.

Mr. Jordan said he would keep fighting to secure the majority of votes he needs to become speaker, and spent much of Wednesday afternoon meeting with some of the holdouts. But it was clear after the second ballot that there was no immediate end in sight to the stalemate that has left the House leaderless and in turmoil after two weeks of Republican infighting.

My levels of schadenfreude are rapidly approaching toxic levels, but this is a risk that I am willing to take.