18 August 2024

That's It. I'm Done.

I do not know what is up with our current reality, but it needs to be torn down and rebuilt from scratch.

Dear God, how about another flood?



Of course, I am not really asking for another flood, I believe that humanity has an obligation to fix its own problems without an exhortation to the divine, but Cthulhu on a crusty cucumber, carrying around fake JD Vance sperm sample cups is a bridge too far.

Republicans are shooting off at Tim Walz, trying to clown the Democratic VP nominee for using IVF by carrying around cups of fake semen ... yeah, we're serious.

Pictures have hit the internet of people outfitted in MAGA merch -- pictures of Donald Trump, bald eagles and American flags plastered on the chest -- and, in their hands their holding sperm sample cups with J.D. Vance's face stickered on the front.

Next to his face the cups read, "J.D. Vance Full Family Kit" ... basically saying the senator from Ohio has some strong swimmers -- after all, he's already got three children.

As for why these supporters are schlepping around the cups -- complete with a opaque white substance we're trying hard not to think about, just BTW -- many are pointing to Tim Walz's own issues with infertility.

Once again, I find that my already low expectations have been exceeded, and I am left staring, dumbfounded, with an expression on my face that resembles that of a cow that just stepped on its own udder.

I am considering going to live in a cave.

Posted by Matthew Saroff at 8:02 PM
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